When getting into martial arts, you need some direction. You don’t necessarily need me. Anyone who has the knowledge from both sides (Student or Coach) can be your guide. But it helps to choose one that is of the same heart as yourself.
I’ve trained and trained with many people in my Journey. I’ve always had the best transfer of knowledge when my trainer or trainee is of the same temperament as myself.
You’ll find that throughout the time you spend in the Martial Arts, people will come and go but a few will become family. That’s one of the more beautiful things that happens. But you’ll come to appreciate it all anyway.
The most important relationship of all I find is, your first Coach/Mentor. Get this right and the sky is the limit. This is mainly because of the time constraints.
As an older fighter, you have less time to make mistakes, which is undoubtedly the most powerful way to learn the martial arts imo. It teaches you a lot about yourself. Some of the things you’ll learn about yourself, you won’t like. Like for example how much Bitch you got inside you.
There will be bumps in the road, but this relationship will be like parent and child. It’s a beautiful thing. You two can conquer the world. Because of this, the world will throw every obstacle it can in your path and it’s more likely that the world will win.
The world is older and way more devious than you will ever be. At your age you will think that you’re smart. That you’ve managed to get this far in your life without killing yourself. Maybe have a family that thinks the world of you you’re a great provider and protector. You know how to love. And for the most part, you’ve got your shit together. So you’re ready for everything this little Martial Arts Lifestyle can throw at you, you’ll be wrong.
To the world, you’re a youngster. Don’t get excited. As far as I’m concerned you’re still ancient. Sorry not sorry.
You may survive and go on to be the next UFC champ, but the odds are against you. And if you let that last statement dominate your thoughts, then you’re truly damned to failure. Why? Because IT’S ALL IN YOUR HEAD.
When I started out, it was impossible for me not to accomplish my goals. Because there were less people around me who could even understand them enough to doubt them and less still that I relied on for any confirmation or blessing to pursue my goals.
I was oblivious to failure. In my head, even if I fell, I’d get get up again and keep moving forward. The only failure is quitting. So you see, I accepted that the road would be tough. I would be fighting guys who were younger, fitter, tougher and even more experienced than myself. On paper they would be way more impressive than I am. They would be super popular and have loads of fans, and I would be the nobody that they’d think very little of, until the cage door was closed and they confidently strut across the canvas to come and start some shit that I would finish. I’d find a way to win. And if they happened to beat me, well I’d thank them for the ass whooping and beat the shit out of the next guy * 2.
Because I’m petty like that.
As I progressed over the years, people got closer to me and under my skin to some extent. And their opinions started to matter. That’s the ultimate killer of dreams.
And as strong as I feel I am , the older I got and the older my kids got the less hungry I became, and the more reliant on community. It became less about me. That’s one of the last nails in the coffin of your dreams.
On any fight night in any fair size arena there is a staggering statistic I’ve always found fascinating. Less than one percent of the attendees are actually there DOING the the thing that they’ve ALL gathered there to witness. (All dreamed about doing)
What that says to me is, only a small percentage think that they can actually do this.
Another statistic. Of the hundreds, maybe thousands of fighters in one weight class on one of these Promotions, there will be about 5 who are regular over the course of a few years, in the TOP 10. And 1 will be champion. Sometimes for a long time.
What’s the difference between those guys and everyone else???
MINDSET
They not only believe, but they also don’t believe.
They believe, without the shadow of a doubt that they are going to become Champions. For them it’s just a matter of time. And a whole heap of pain. Physically and mentally.
But it will be worth it.
They don’t believe in being REALISTIC!
Which is what most of their loved ones, friends and family are.
It’s what society teaches.
There is nothing in our education system that focuses on how to become a champion. They think they do I’m sure, but they don’t.
The system teaches you how to be ok.
That is not so much of a criticism from me.
There isn’t enough space for all of us to be champions, so if that’s what you want then you literally have to fight for it.
Most of your closest loved ones, rarely all, want to see you doing well. They don’t want you to get hurt. I hate to be the one to tell you this but some them want the opposite. Learn to spot these Trojan Horsemen.
I can’t give any stats on how many will say the following words but can guarantee you will hear them.
“BE REALISTIC “
Get over it. When you hear those words, just remember that I warned you. Don’t hate them. Just don’t rely on them. Most people that you knew before coming to martial Arts will NOT follow you on this journey except when you do really well. They will fade away and your circle will become super small and you will come to realise that you prefer it. Because Martial Arts will change you at the core. It is one of the only things in life that I can hand on heart say this about.
You will be more aware of and less tolerant to bullshit. You will realise that this lifestyle isn’t cohesive with most other lifestyles. That will affect your household. Beware of that.
That’s enough REALITY for now. Hope this helps clear up some of your questions.
I’ll speak to you again soon.
